Archive for December, 2011

Happy New Year…seriously.

December 31, 2011

Ok.  I know what you’re thinking: ‘he’s gone soft’.  That’s not it at all.  I just want all of you to know that I am going to do my part to make it easier for all of you to follow this advice.

Don’t treat me with dignity or respect unless I earn it.  Because running around and respecting everyone for yucks is crazy.  Half those bastards would kill you and drink your blood if they thought that they could benefit from it.  Especially the folks in this video.  They’re trying to lure you in.

It’s a dog eat dog world out there, people.  Don’t let your guard down for a second.  I’m not saying you can’t treat everyone with dignity and respect the shit out of them.  Just do it with one eye open.

You’re welcome.


Almost go time

December 30, 2011

With the holidays just about over, hunting season concluding tom.  and only one more load of lobster traps to land, it’s time to start planning for the future.  First and foremost, we have to go and find some fish.  At the same time, I’m going to take advantage of the lack of snow to start a couple of projects and lighten the load for spring.

Phase one will be prepping the area below our lowest garden for a new row of fruit trees and a dozen or so Christmas trees:

The five foot York rake and my neighbors 45hp New Holland tractor should make short work of this…with the exception of digging the holes.

Phase two will be the construction of a new compost bin that will be able to handle more material than our current tumblers.  I’ve got my eye on something like this:

Naturally, my finished product will look a little more like an abandoned cardboard box shelter built by a one-armed chimp.  But its nice to dream.

Phase three will be to bring in a bobcat once the ground freezes to clear and grade a new patch of lawn around the chicken coup.  I’ve told myself over and over again not to put in any more grass to mow.   But sometimes, when the mood strikes, it’s better to act than think.

Before any of this can take place, we have to survive our annual New Years Eve bash.  Shits gonna git weird.

And why should you care about any of this?

Beats me.

Jack Edwards is the happiest man alive…

December 29, 2011

Just lovin’ hockey.

Raffi Torres, not so much.


Yoga pants

December 28, 2011

I Just heard an argument that yoga pants are ‘not pants!’

How could someone say this?  The word pants is right in the name.

Listen, the last thing that I would do is oil myself up and try to squeeze into a pair of yoga pants.  I’m well aware of my shortcomings and will never be the svelte,  ripped, well-endowed, clean-cut, nice smelling ladies man that I see whenever I look in the mirror.  But I wouldn’t go hating on fellas that are.  Good for them.  And wifey, go ahead and get yourself a good ol’ fashioned eye full.

You think that yoga pants are too revealing?  Fine…don’t wear them.  But don’t steal that joy from others.  And the others that are also enjoying their joy.

And that’s one to grow on.

Happy Holidays

December 24, 2011

Shot through the heart…

December 24, 2011

And I’m to blame.   I give pretty much everything a bad name.

After several (I don’t care to discuss just how many) years of epic failures, near misses and embarrassing mistakes I have killed my first deer.  I don’t care that some may think ‘that thing looks like the Grinch’s dog’.  I’ll have a box of venison tomorrow.   Which means tenderloin tomorrow night.

And I’d be cheating myself if I didn’t comment on how dead sexy I am in camo.  It’s a white trash Christmas miracle!

December 22, 2011

Best available science…

December 18, 2011

A term that have been thrown around quite a bit over the last two years while sector management has been implemented.  Seems to make sense:  Use the most recent numbers to make decisions and allocate quota to the fleet.  Unless, of course, that science is going to bring too much bad press to the sector system which must be protected at all costs to ensure that the cash cow continues to spew milk for the profiteers.   Case in point: Pollock.  Immediately considered a ‘choke’ species, whose allocations were too low (based on the best available science) to allow vessels to continue to fish for other species.   The powers that be recognized the potential for anti-sector press and simply said: “Whoops.  Seems our numbers were off.  There are actually ten times more pollock than we thought”

Now, after a year and a half of listening to the big green machine regurgitate numbers to assure us that sectors will be a huge success once a few little wrinkles are ironed out,  it seems the best available science has discovered a crash in the Gulf of Maine cod population.   Talk of a potential 90% cut in allocations for next year.  Just three years ago the cod stock assessment assured that what the fishermen were seeing was right on: a healthy population on the rise.   While the contradictions as to who is at fault begin to stack up, I think that it is important to remember one thing: it won’t matter what the allocations are; it won’t matter who will profit from selling quota that they do not have to catch; it will not matter how many offshore boats are fishing inshore; it will not matter who’s ‘fault’ it is; If there are no fish to catch, everyone who goes to sea to make a living is fucked.

NOAA’s army of recent college grads will not suffer.  They will conduct business as usual.  As will EDF, CLF, PEW and all of the other enlightened regurgitators who believe they can make predictions on how  nature will respond to numbers on paper.  Someone will eventually have to recognize that the best available science is either not being conducted and/or acted upon timely  enough; is not being used properly; or is so far off base that on the whole it resembles a fine set of tits on a bull.

Fishermen have always dealt with boom and bust.  But remember, before sectors there were more options.  Hand-cuffed by groundfish allocations, there is only so much  room for more  lobster traps; there are only so many tuna to catch; and native shrimp populations are starting to look like the first casualty of the sector system.

Merry Christmas.

December 18, 2011

December 16, 2011